How much should you give away for free

and why it's so hard to calibrate

You know that feeling when someone asks for a "quick chat" to pick your brain and you freeze? Part of you wants to help, another part screams "my time is valuable!" Let's talk about this.

Most of us start by giving everything away. We're unsure of our value, scared to ask for money, worried we're not good enough. We tell ourselves we're being generous but deep down we know - we're just afraid of rejection. My own stark example of this was when I first offered Wuju (wuju.app) for $30/month combined with weekly hour long coaching sessions. I was essentially selling my time for $7.5/hour and was still hearing it was too expensive.

Then something clicks. Maybe we get burned by a "friend" who took advantage. Maybe those "it's too expensive" comments finally cross a boundary. Maybe we realize our bank account is empty while our calendar is full.

So we swing hard in the opposite direction. "No more free calls!" we declare. "My hourly rate is $X and that's final!" We feel professional, established, respected. If you've been following me here, you may have seen me proclaim that my hour is now worth $1000 and that I don't do free work anymore 🫣 .

There's obviously a problem with this approach too. We miss out on relationships that could have blossomed into something amazing. We close doors that might have led to unexpected opportunities. We become rigid when we could be fluid. I sure did.

The sweet spot lies somewhere in between. It's not about never doing things for free - it's about choosing when and why you do them.

Maybe you spot unusual potential in someone who can't afford your rates yet. Maybe you have some extra time and energy and want to pay it forward. Maybe you just genuinely enjoy certain conversations and see them as relationship building rather than consulting.

The key is to check your motivations. Are you giving because you're afraid to charge? Or because you've made a conscious choice to invest in this particular relationship or opportunity?

Here's a simple way to tell the difference: If you feel resentful after giving something for free, you probably did it from fear. If you feel energized and excited about the possibilities, you probably did it from strength.

Don't mistake lack of confidence for generosity. And don't mistake selfishness for good business sense. True generosity comes from a place of abundance, not scarcity. It's a choice, not a default.

Your time and expertise have real value. Give them freely when it makes strategic sense, charge for them proudly when it doesn't.

Most importantly, trust yourself to know the difference.